6 Ways To Have A Successful Marriage


I’ve been married for four years Alhamdulilah and through my marriage I’ve had ups and downs like every marriage but my wife and I didn’t want to be another statistic. Have you heard? New marriages fail within the first six months! Yeah, you read that right. The first six months are the hardest. We all obviously get married to have the longest marriage possible. InshaAllah until the end of our lives. I’ll do my best to give you six ways to have a successful marriage.

1. Putting Allah first

When we first got married, we would pray together, read Quran together, listen to lectures, and read books. During that time, we also didn’t have much. My wife was pregnant with our first child and we were struggling but, we had Allah. We remembered Allah as often as we could and put Him first. Later during our marriage, things started going downhill. We got busy with work and the kids and had more fights than ever before. We sat down and asked ourselves, what is really the issue here? We thought about the times before we had what we had now and what we used to do? We put our lives, our jobs, our kids first and Allah second. We stopped reciting Quran together. We stopped listening to lectures. We stopped praying Salah together and our marriage was going downhill. Eventually we realized, it was our Islam that was lacking and we needed to work on it together. We couldn’t have one practicing more than the other. Islam needed to be our first priority and that was something needed to be done together.

The Prophet Muhammad (peace & blessings be upon him) said Allah said: Whoever draws close to me by the length of a hand, I will draw close to him by the length of an arm. Whoever draws close to me the by length of an arm, I will draw close to him by the length of a fathom. Whoever comes to me walking, I will come to him running. (Shahih Muslim)

The further we are from Allah the more our marriage gets tested with it. It is a way of Allah telling you to turn back to him in order to be successful.

2. Loving Each Other Differently

We cannot love each other equally. No matter what happens in the relationship, it’ll never happen. What I mean by that is, I’ll love my wife differently and she will love me differently. Our acts of love towards each other is different. My wife had a hard time early on in the marriage as to why I was teasing her and being playful. She didn’t understand that this was my way of showing her love. It’s something that was embedded in me from my parents. She always thought I was a goof and wasn’t being serious but this is how I display love for her. A lot of how we display love and want to receive it is based on our environment. Based on what we believe is an act of love. Some people have parents or role models who give gifts or cook or clean to show appreciation and love to another person. Just because the person isn’t showing you love how you perceive it, doesn’t mean they don’t love you. They do love you, they just show it differently. Speak to your spouse about how you want love to be displayed. What makes you happy so there isn’t a misunderstanding or heartache over how to love one another.

3. Keeping Your Marriage Within Your Home

They say, the less people that know about your life, the better it is and less drama. The more people that know, the more drama. Your married life, your struggles, your fights should stay between you and your significant other. If you get your family involved into every single thing, I promise you, you will have a terrible marriage. The less they know the better it is. The only ever time you want your marriage to leave the walls of your home is when you know it’s falling apart and you are seeking help from a balanced and unbiased individual.

Also do your best to keep it away from social media as people with sick hearts and sick minds want it destroyed.

The Prophet Muhammad (Peace & Blessings Be Upon Him) advised us about the evil eye and how it is real. That could even kill a person. That’s how serious it is.

The Prophet Muhammad (Peace & Blessings Be Upon Him) said: The evil eye is real and if anything were to overtake the divine decree, it would be the evil eye. (Shahih Muslim)

If you want a successful marriage, keep your marriage within the walls of your home and don’t share things with random people or even people you suspect don’t want good for you.

4. Fulfilling & Respecting The Rights Of Each other

Allah didn’t just decide to give the husband and wife rights over one another for no reason. There was wisdom behind it but because nowadays with the media turning the minds of the people, they feel this is barbaric and from the stones ages. SubhanAllah! There is nothing in Islam that was ever written or told to the Prophet Muhammad (Peace & Blessings Be Upon Him) that was ever going to be harmful to us. Fulfilling the rights of each other and not over stepping boundaries is an act of love and an act of worship which you will be rewarded for. There are men, who do over step the boundaries and they need be fearful of Allah. Your wife has a right over you and Allah does say in the Quran in Surah An-Nisa: “live with them with kindness” (4:19). As you both have given these rights by Allah fulfill to the best of your ability and respect each other. Be kind to one another and be mindful of the words you utter as it may be hurtful and leave scars. Verbal abuse is real and can be damaging. Allah has given each you a trust in marriage, to honor and to live worshiping Allah.

5. Understanding Differences & Communicating

The first six months is the hardest! I won’t even lie because you are learning about each other’s previous habits, lifestyle and cultures. What you do may get on her nerves and there will be a fight for no reason. Understand that both of you came from a different environment where what you thought was normal is now abnormal. This doesn’t mean you are incompatible. It just means there needs to be time to adjust to one another. To communicate previous lifestyles, habits and cultures. Neither of you are attempting to change one another just adapting to the environment and home you are in now. Patience needs to be practiced and communication needs to be key. Communicate to one another the habits and lifestyle you previously had so they can get an understanding of why you do certain things a certain way.

6. Forgiving Each Other & Swallowing Your Pride

Marriage will get hard at times and things will be said that will be hurtful. Both of you won’t talk to one another but deep you know you love each other. You just are confused why that was said to you. It is absolutely important that you over look faults, swallow your pride and reconcile. If you really want to make this work, you will have to be willing to work it out. You have to be willing to accept the faults and move on. This isn’t to say that you need walk over each other because then this will turn into abuse. If absolutely important to be mindful of the tongue and to never put hands on each other no matter how difficult things may get. Learn to move on. Talk things out and addressing the hurt in order to improve the marriage. Nobody said it was going to be easy and movies obviously lied to you. There will days where you will be angry at each other and won’t talk. Have your space but learn to make up and forgive each other. 

There could be more but InshaAllah I feel these are the most important ones. These are six ways to have a successful marriage based on my experience. InshaAllah these help you out. If you ever need advice or help, please feel free to reach out to me. I’ll do my best to help InshaAllah. 

40 Worldly Benefits Of Abandoning Sins

The great scholar, Ibn Qayyim Al-Jawziyyah (may Allaah have mercy on him) mentioned a great number of benefits that one can enjoy in this life before being honoured with the unending reward of Allaah in the hereafter. He mentioned the following:

  1. Maintaining personal integrity (muroo’ah)
  2. Keeping your name and reputation clean
  3. Protecting your social status
  4. Preserving wealth that Allaah has provided and made as a means to take care of worldly and religious benefits
  5. A wholesome life
  6. A properly rested body
  7. A strong heart
  8. A clean soul
  9. Happiness of the heart
  10. A relaxed chest
  11. Security from the worries that affect the wicked and disobedient (specifically)
  12. Less worry, sadness, and grief (in general)
  13. Inner strength of personal honour, not yielding to disgrace
  14. Safeguarding the light in one’s heart from being extinguished by the darkness of disobedience
  15. A way around (or out of) what confines the wicked and disobedient
  16. Being granted provisions easily from avenues unthought of
  17. General ease being granted in affairs that are difficult upon the people of disobedience
  18. Having acts of obedience made a easy for you to perform
  19. Having knowledge made easy for you to attain
  20. The general speech of the people in your favour
  21. Lots of supplications are made in your favour
  22. The delight that can be seen your face
  23. The respect that is place in the people’s hearts for you
  24. Their support and defense of you when harmed or oppressed
  25. Their defense of you in the presence of those who backbite you
  26. Quick responses to your supplications
  27. The dispelling of unfamiliarity between you and Allaah
  28. The closeness of the angels
  29. Distance from the devils, both the jinn and human of them
  30. The people outdoing each other to serve you and take care of your needs
  31. Their seeking your love and companionship
  32. Not being afraid of death, instead you are happy to meet your Lord and to reach your final abode
  33. The insignificance of this world in your heart
  34. True reverence of the hereafter in your heart
  35. Vigilance regarding the great dominion (of paradise) and the great success that lies within it
  36. Tasting the sweetness of obedience
  37. Attaining the sweetness of faith
  38. The supplications of the angels who bear the throne, and the other angels as well
  39. The joy of the angels who write your deeds and their constant supplications in your favour
  40. An increase in intellect, understanding, faith, and knowledge
  41. Attaining the love of Allaah, His attention, and His happiness with your repentance

And Allaah knows best

Summarized and listed by: Moosa Richardson

One Door Closes, Another One Opens

Life happens and we don’t always get what we want. Sometimes it’s for things we worked so hard for and some things we’ve been praying for but nonetheless, it doesn’t go our away. We beat ourselves up over it, thinking if I did this or if I did that, It would have been mine or we end up envying the individual who got it over us. We tell ourselves it is not fair and we feel like life it at it’s worse and it can’t get any better.

Take a second, relax, breathe. I know you wanted it so bad but did you ever think that it may not be good for you? That there is something else in the future for you? That this door of opportunity that you thought closed, actually opened another? That your skills, assets, learning experience is in place for a MUCH better position in this life?

Anytime something doesn’t go your way, think ahead in your life, not behind. This allows you to think positively for the future. We may not know what is in store but it allows your body to relax and breathe a little easier knowing that there is always something better. You tried, you did your best but it wasn’t for you. Know that you aren’t a failure and no matter what event has occurred in your life, there is something better. Whether you believe there is a higher power or not.

Islam allows us to think further ahead and not behind us. Islam tells us that the believer to be grateful and tells us to believe that ALL the affairs, events in your lives have been good for us.

The Prophet Muhammad (Peace & Blessings Be Upon Him) said: “Amazing is the affair of the believer, verily all of his affairs are good and this is not for no one except the believer. If something of good or happiness befalls him he is grateful and that is good for him. If something of harm befalls him he is patient and that is good for him” [Shahih Muslim]

Sometimes we do need to see further out, rather than thinking too deep within. It is not the choices we have made but it is Allah subhanawatala telling you, there is something better for you. Life is a beautiful blessing and the beauty gets distorted due to the way we think about “missed” opportunities, closed doors or so called “failures.” Every single door that has closed has opened another but we are too blind, too caught up on the closed door to see the opening of another. Next time you think something has been missed or you failed at something, know this is not the end but there is something greater intended for you on the other side.

And Allah knows best.

The World Owes You Nothing!

Nobody in this world owes you anything nor are you entitled to a position or place. Everything in this life is a blessing, a gift from Allah. Ask yourself, who are you to say, this world owes you something because of your deeds? Because of your good behaviour? Because of your work ethic? You are nobody. You were just a clot at one time in your mothers womb, helpless, lifeless and Allah granted you life and during those earlier years, you were still helpless reliant on your mothers suckle in order to grow. Reliant on your mother and fathers nurture and love in order to grow. So who said, the world owes you anything? The world owes you absolutely nothing! It is YOU who owes Allah everything, for giving you life. For allowing you to breathe another day. To have a roof over your head, food in your stomach, and clothes on your back. Do you not understand how fortunate you are but yet you complain about your life every single day. You complain because life isn’t going smoothly, even after Allah granted your du’aa (supplication).

The world owes you NOTHING! Stop complaining, be grateful for life and everything you have. Life is a beautiful blessing and nothing will ever replace it. It may not be going how you’ve imagined but it’s setting you up for success. Failures need to happen in life, in order to see the fruits of your labour. Success requires failure because without failure, success cannot be tasted. And no problem ever gets solved by complaining, it requires a plan and action. The world owes you NOTHING! Stop complaining and think for a second, now breathe. Feel that? You’ll never get that breath back, it’s gone forever. Cherish your life. Every single minute of your life counts and every single minute you complain, is a minute wasted. Time is a valuable asset and will NEVER return.

The world owes you NOTHING! Everything in life is a blessing and earned through hard work, failure and patience. The next time you tell yourself or believe the world owes you anything, remind yourself, you’ve been given everything as a favour from Allah. A blessing, which can be taken away. You do everything for the sake of Allah, to enter jannah (heaven), in hopes your du’aa (supplication) and good deeds get accepted. This is what you work for, the sake of Allah and nobody else.

The world owes you NOTHING! You owe all thanks to Allah whom has granted you Islam as your religion and made you Muslim. Who has given you another chance to live and succeed. To repent for your sins and do more good deeds.


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In 2015 My Wife Was Pregnant & All We had Was A $1.07 In Our Bank Account


In December of 2015 I found out that my wife was pregnant and we were only married for a couple of months and I was struggling to find work. The previous job I had, they closed the position I was hired for. I was stressed and worried what was going to happen next. My wife and I were living with my parents. Some people would say we made a bad decision planning a kid without a stable income. My wife a few days after we got married came back with me to Toronto from the state of New York with nothing. When I mean nothing, I literally mean it. All she had was the clothes on her back and the mahr(gift) I gave her. It’s not like this battle was new to us and we strive with challenges like this. I felt bad for putting my wife in a situation like this but she always reminded me that I am doing my best and Allah is Ar-Razzaq (the provider).

Every night starting December of 2015, when we found out about her pregnancy, I woke up a half hour before fajr and prayed tahajjud. Making duaa (supplication) with tears falling from my cheeks asking for a change. Life was hard, unpredictable and hectic. I didn’t ask my parents for a penny to help us and I’ve alwaaaaaaaays been that way. They would offer to help but I’d refuse because my wife is my responsibility and not theirs. They were already doing so much by letting us stay. Months would go by and I’d still wake up in the middle of the night, half hour before fajr to pray tahajjud and beg Allah to change my situation. I was putting in the effort every single day! Applying to jobs, dropping off applications, going to job agencies and nothing! My wife would look at me and would see the stress on my face, on my body, the way I slept at night. It was worrisome for her but not once did she yell at me or tell me if you don’t find a job, I am leaving you! She constantly encouraged me and told me, it’s okay, Allah knows best and He is the best of planners. You are doing an amazing job! Allah see’s you are trying. It was April 2016 and all I had was $1.07 in my bank account. You read that right. I was damn near broke! With a baby on the way in 4 months, married, I didn’t know where to turn. I wanted to give up praying tahajjud because I felt that nothing was happening and I am doomed! I didn’t give up! I kept waking up every single day until May 2016, that’s when things changed.

One morning in May 2016 my duaas (supplication) were answered. The weight on my shoulders were lifted and every single worry I had was gone. Finally got a job and life changed! My duaa(supplication) was answered. For that particular job I was making duaa (supplication) for 5 years. I was persistent. I never gave up! Today, our daughter is two and we also have a 10 month old son, alhamdulilah!

One advice I can give you all is that Allah’s promise is true! Rely on Him and Insha’Allah (if Allah wills) your situation can change. Allah wants you to turn to Him in good and bad situations and to be always be thankful and know your duaas(supplications) aren’t going unheard.

People think marriage is a burden but it isn’t. It’s a beautiful blessing. It comes with so much that is unexpected because Allah said:

“And marry those among you who are single (male and female). If they be poor, Allah will enrich them out of His bounty.” [Surah Nur, 32]

I am proof of this struggle. Not because of so called “bad” decisions. No! The marriage, baby and no job was the will of Allah and His way of testing me by wanting me to turn him and Allah is the best of planners. Life is written and where you turn to and how you turn to can write the rest of your life out. In the end, as Muslims we know what we were created for and that is to please Allah. Insha’Allah we do our best in pleasing Him because success is only from Him and Him alone.

Insha’Allah this post encourages many of to never give up in life and continue to be ambitious towards your goals! Wake up before fajr, 10, 20, 30 mins before and ask Allah to guide to the straight path and to open doors in ways that is pleasing to Him, to help you become successful in this life and the hereafter.

Dear Single Muslims


I know you await the day you to fulfill half of your deen (religion). You’ve heard it over and over again, get married, start a life but by the will of Allah, it hasn’t happened yet. I know you are losing hope because people are telling you you are getting old or “you are getting past your expiry date.” They also say to you, who will marry you if you get any older? Do they not know that our beloved mother, Khadija (may Allah be pleased with her) married our Prophet Muhammad (peace & blessings be upon him) at the age of 40? So, how could you listen to such falsehood? How could you lose hope? Do you not see that Allah says in Surah An Naba: “And we created you in pairs” [78:8] Do you not see that Allah has set aside someone for you? Why do you lose hope? Is it because your friends are getting married and you feel stranded? Do you think you’ll never be loved or no one will marry you? That is far from true. Hopeful potentials never worked out? Alhamdulilah (thanks to Allah), know that Allah protected you from a trial or tribulation that could have ruined you. You will not expire like milk nor will you die lonely.

Have hope in Allah, make du’aa and be patient, the individual Allah has saved for you will always be there. Allah has written our lives in the womb our of mothers, so just sit and relax, it’ll happen when its meant to be. Don’t be desperate and ruin your life by marrying anybody. Know that you as a Muslim should look for an individual with good Islamic qualities and characteristics. Does their best to follow Islam to the best of their abilities. Money isn’t everything. Good looks isn’t everything but the deen (religion) is everything. It is your ticket to jannah (heaven).

Don’t be hopeless but be hopeful. Have faith in Allah and know your du’aa (supplications) are not going unheard. Allah heard and accepted Prophet Yunus (peace be upon him) du’aa (supplication) from the belly of the whale, so what makes you think yours wont be fulfilled? It is only a matter of time but for now, smile and enjoy life. Take it one day at a time. Your marriage will happen when Allah wills for it no matter what others say, you will get married one day, insha’Allah.

If you have a question, please email me at: mshabazz33@gmail.com

The Correct Du’aa (Supplication) When Breaking Your Fast

Assalamwalikhum (peace be upon you)

Alhamdulilah (thanks to Allah), we have reached another blessed month of Ramadan. On many of our Ramadan timetables there is a du’aa that has been passed around for years as the correct du’aa to break your fast. I have recited it for years, you have and so have many of our family members and friends. The du’aa, “Allahumma inni laka sumtu wa bika aamantu wa ‘ala rizq-ika aftarthu” (O Allah! I fasted for You and I believe in You and I break my fast with Your sustenance). Did you know this hadith is weak? Yes, the du’aa printed on Ramadan timetables every year, that we recite is actually from a hadith that is weak, which has been graded weak by Sheikh Al-Albaani (may Allah have mercy upon him). I bet you didn’t know there is another du’aa that you recite and you’ve probably never come across before and this du’aa is authentic! The correct du’aa to recite is: Dhahaba al-zama’ wa abtalat al-‘urooq wa thabata al-ajr in sha Allaah (Thirst is gone, the veins are moistened and the reward is certain if Allaah wills).” [Abu Dawood]

May Allah make this Ramadan easy for us and keep us on the straight path



Shab-E-Bharat & Following Innovations

Asalamwalikhum my Muslim brothers and sisters. Tonight is supposedly a night. A blessed night where many Muslims from around the world will gather and sit in the remembrance of Allah subhanawatala. Some will fast through out the day. Some will read Qur’an. Some will gather in the masajids and listen to lectures about this blessed night.

Sadly, many Muslims neglect the authentic narrations from the Prophet Muhammad (peace & blessings be upon him) and follow the unauthentic ones. Shab-E-Bharat is one of them. All the hadiths that are mentioned about this night are based on weak hadith. There is not a single, not one authentic narration from the Prophet Muhammad (peace & blessings be upon him) about this night. Even after there is an overwhelming proof from the scholars of Islam, there are those who reject it and continously to follow blindly with these innovations.

I ask you to comp template this. Has the Messenger of Allah left out anything in this religion of Islaam? Has he not told his companions something they don’t know and some how, we are the only ones that know? Of course not because they were with him day in and day out but yet, Muslims still follow their desires, the people whom they are surrounded by and follow many innovations today. Do they not know that Allah subhanawatala told us in the Qur’an that He has completed the religion? That this religion is complete and there is not a single thing left out?

Allah subhanawatala says in Surah Al-Ma’idah:

“This day I have perfected for you your religion and completed my favour upon you (O Muhammad) and have approved for you Islam as religion.”

Oh, Muslims. Why do you choose to follow blindly? Why do you choose to follow people in these innovations? Has what Allah and the Messenger of Allah not enough for you? Do you not know that every single innovation is misguidance and every single of them is in the hell fire? The Prophet Muhammad (peace & blessings be upon him) didn’t say some innovations, he didn’t say a few innovations, he said every single one of them.

Wake up Muslims!!! This religion is complete and to follow it the way the Prophet Muhammad (peace & blessings be upon him), his companions, we need to revert back to the ways they followed it. Not the way it has been innovated by many people today.

Allah says in Surah Al-An’am:

“If you obey most of those on earth, they will mislead you from the way of Allah. They follow but conjecture and they only lie.”