Don’t Be Forced To Marry Someone You Don’t Want To


Whenever you decide to get married, please don’t force yourself to like someone because your parents have presented them to you. Often at times, parents will present their children with someone they find interest in and then force their children to like them and marry them because they think they are a perfect fit for them. This is incorrect and you’ll more than likely be in a miserable marriage because you never wanted them in the first place. It’s like sitting at a table with your least favourite foods and they are telling you to eat it, while on the other side of the table, all your favourite foods are there.

Be smart when you are making this decision. It is going to be your life, your hours, your time, your heart, your effort into this marriage not your parents. Of course they’ll help you with the nikah and walima but after that, it is just you and your spouse. Parents who are culturally grounded will beg you stay in the marriage because it’ll tarnish their reputation, while you are emotionally destroyed everyday. They’ll force you, they’ll blackmail you, they’ll constantly beg you to stay. No, you don’t have to stay if you don’t want to, so before it ever gets to that point, make the right decision on who you want to marry. Don’t marry because your parents say they are good for you but know within your heart, from making a decision then praying ishtikhara if they are good for you. Ishtikhara isn’t Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala making a decision for you, it is Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala guiding you to a better decision. It’s not about dreams either. It’s not about seeing colours and all that. Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala is going to facilitate a matter which is going to be best for you.

Make a stand, be courageous, stand up for what you want and what you don’t think is right for you. If you are quiet while your parents are setting someone up for you, you are to blame because you allowed it. You are allowed to make decisions, so make sure, this one, marriage is a right decision and not a forceful one.

Helping you choose the right spouse is covered in my book “The Strongest Version Of Yourself”

You can purchase the book here: (Currently Pay What You Want – PDF VERSION) ($4.99 – KINDLE VERSION)

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