We read about many stories or hear stories of people and their romantic love life. At times, we even see them in them movies and many of us go “Awwwwwwww! I wish I could have that!” Knowing it is not real but the way it is displayed we become infatuated with this unrealistic display of love. Many of us don’t know that, there has been a time more than 1400 years ago, way before you and I were born there was a man by the name Muhammad (Peace & Blessings Be Upon Him). Many anti-Islamic, Islamophobes display him as several things he wasn’t. They love to depict him in a disrespectful, untruthful manner. What many of us don’t know is how did the Prophet Muhammad (Peace & Blessings Be Upon Him) display his love for his wives? Many of us are married and have been married for a very long time. Many of us are looking to get married and are clueless about the hadiths, stories of how the Messenger Of Allah was romantic. It is as if, it is taboo for a man to act or display romance or love the way the Messenger Of Allah did. This exterior as if being hard and not too soft is laughed at or looked down upon but little do they know, they are missing out on a Sunnah, an act which the Prophet Muhammad (Peace & Blessings Be Upon Him) did, which we will be rewarded for. I’d like to relate a few hadiths, stories I’ve gathered on how the Prophet Muhammad (Peace & Blessings Be Upon Him) displayed his love to one of his wives Aisha (may Allah be pleased with her).
Once the Prophet Muhammad (Peace & Blessings Be Upon Him) was sitting in a room with Aisha (May Allah be pleased with her) and fixing his shoes. It was very warm, and Aisha looked to his blessed forehead and noticed that there were beads of sweat on it. She became overwhelmed by the majesty of that sight and was staring at him long enough for him to notice.
He said, “What’s the matter?” She replied, “If Abu Bukair Al-Huthali, the poet, saw you, he would know that his poem was written for you.”The Prophet, peace be upon him, asked, “What did he say?” She replied, “Abu Bukair said that if you looked to the majesty of the moon, it twinkles and lights up the world for everyone to see.”So the Prophet, peace be upon him, got up, walked to Aisha, kissed her between the eyes, and said, “By God, O Aisha, you are like that to me and more.”
[This was narrated in Imam Abu Nu’aim’s “Dala’el Al-Nubuwa” with a chain of transmission (isnad) including Imam Bukhari and Imam Ibn Khuzaina.]
Aisha (May Allah be pleased with her) relates the following about her husband, the Prophet (Peace & Blessings Be Upon Him Upon):
I swear by Allah that I saw Allah’s Messenger (peace be upon him) standing at the door of my room while the Abyssinians were engaged in spear play in the mosque of Allah’s Messenger (peace be upon him). He screened me with his cloak so I could watch them perform. He stood there for my sake until I decided that I had had enough. Now just imagine how much time a young girl eager for entertainment would stand there watching. [Sahîh al-Bukhârî and Sahîh Muslim]
When the Prophet Muhammad (Peace & Blessings Be Upon Him) would have a meal with Aisha (May Allah be pleased with her), they would both eat from the same plate and drink from the same cup as each other. What the Prophet (Peace & Blessings Be Upon Him) would do is, turn the cup where Aishas lip marks were left and would drink from that side of the cup. He would also make eye contact with her and then drink.[Sahîh al-Bukhârî ]
Aisha (May Allah be pleased with her) said: That she accompanied the Prophet on a certain journey. At that time she was a mere girl and was neither fat nor bulky. The Prophet asked the people to move on, and they marched ahead. Then the Prophet said to me, “Come on, let us have a race.” ‘Aisha says that she ran and remained much ahead of him. The Prophet kept quiet for some time. Later on when Aisha grew fat and loose bodied, and she forgot the previous incident. Again she accompanied the Prophet on some journey. The Prophet again asked the people to march ahead, and they moved ahead. Then the Prophet again asked her to have a race with him. This time the prophet defeated her and she lagged behind. Now the Prophet laughed and said, “This is in reply to our previous defeat.” [Ahmad, Safwat as-Safwah]
Aisha (May Allah Be Pleased With Her) would often seek reassurance from The Prophet (Peace & Blessings Be Upon Him) that he loved her.
“How is your love for me?” she once asked.
“Like the rope’s knot,” he replied, meaning that it was strong and secure.
Many times after that she would ask, “How is the knot?” and he would reply: “Ala haaliha” meaning “The same as ever!” [Hilya al Awliya]
So why are we ashamed or why do we prevent ourselves from expressing in a manner that has been displayed by who we are supposed to follow? This should encourage us, make us open minded and display our love to our spouses this way. Eat with them, race with them and speak to them gently. Words of sweetness and love. Being rough, speaking to your spouses in a disrespectful manner, being harsh, neglecting them is not the treatment the Prophet Muhammad (Peace Be Upon Him) has showed us. This is who we are supposed to follow. Islam is beautiful as it shows all aspects on how to be. There are things you do which you will be rewarded for. Display your love to your spouse. Be creative. Be romantic. Be sweet. Be loving and most important of all, do it because it is what it taught in Islam. This is both for the husband and the wife. This isn’t directed to the man but women, you can do it too, don’t expect your husband to do it all the time. Now you know how the Messenger of Allah displayed his love and was romantic with Aisha (may Allah be pleased with her), you can too. Insha’Allah.