Start 2015 Being The Strongest Version Of Yourself

You can purchase the book here:

https://payhip.com/b/3FdM (Pay Whatever You Want – PDF VERSION)

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00QFUJQHW ($4.99 – KINDLE VERSION)

Read Book Reviews Here:

http://mshabazz33.wordpress.com/the-strongest-version-of-yourself-book-reviews/

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Solutions: Moving On With Life

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Life isn’t going how you hoped and a lot of things didn’t go your way. You worked extremely hard for that test, exam, projects and many other things. You had hoped to marry that individual after having nothing but good feelings and signs, as you thought, Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala was allowing the marriage to happen but it didn’t go your way. Today, you feel like your life is a mess and you can’t seem to understand what is going on or how it happened.

Insha’Allah (if Allah wills), I will give you some solutions on how to get over it

1. Everything is by the permission of Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala

You might be thinking in your head, how come? Why did this happen to me? What could I have done to prevent this? As long as you did your best to make things right, you should be proud of yourself not and kick yourself over it. Everything is by the will and permission of Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala. Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala does say in the Qur’an:

Not a leaf falls but that He knows it. And no grain is there within the darknesses of the earth and no moist or dry [thing] but that it is [written] in a clear record.” [6:59]

Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala also says:

Indeed, all things We created with predestination.” [54:49]

This does not mean Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala wants something bad for you but in something not going your way is good and a trial itself. Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala tests those whom He loves and He wants you to turn to Him.

The Prophet Muhammad (Peace & Blessings Be Upon Him) said: “The greatest reward comes from the greatest trial. When Allah loves people, He tests, and whoever accepts it gains the pleasure of Allah and whoever complains earns his wrath.” [Tirmidhi]

Take it as a sign that Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala loves you, accept it with gratitude and be humble. You are a chosen in this hardship which you perceive is bad for you but will only increase your ranks in jannah (heaven). Turn to Him and only He will help you out of this situation.

2. What Has Being Sad Done?

You may have been sad for a few days, weeks or months but what has it done for you? Has it helped your situation or made it worse? Did it change the situation you were once in? No, it hasn’t. While accepting the qadr of Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala, you need to start being positive about this outcome. You may say, I can’t, my body won’t let me. Im too sad to get over it. This is too hard. You are only saying that because you’ve allowed yourself to believe that. I know you want to get over it and move on with your life but you need to pick yourself up and start moving your feet. You can’t be negative thinking this has been bad for you. Maybe if you moved on with your life and accepted this, good things starting happening? Just because one door closes, doesn’t mean another door isn’t opening. And just because you may have failed in something, doesn’t mean you won’t succeed in something else. Behind every successful person, there’s a lot of unsuccessful years. Everything will take time but it is time for you to move on with your life.

3. Life Is Going On With Or Without You

Tomorrow is going to come, the date is going to change, the sun is going to go up, then go down and the moon is going to appear. A minute goes by without your permission and then an hour, and then a full day. Do you see, life doesn’t need your permission and the universe doesn’t need your permission to change. In a few weeks, months or next year, you will get older without your permission. Every single day is precious and you are wasting it by sulking in something that you cannot no longer change. What you can do though is change the condition you are in now. You can start moving on with your life and start to plan for better things. You can be optimistic about better things to come. Don’t wait until you are 40 or 60 or even close to death, wishing you moved on with your life, instead of being broken up about something that was out of your control. You have the ability to change your condition, your sadness by looking at things in a positive way and moving on with life, just as each day is moving on without you.

4. Say Alhumdulilah (thanks to Allah)

Say Alhumdulilah (thanks to Allah ) for guiding you away from possible harm in which you thought was a blessing. Your life may have even turned for the worse if that particular thing did happen. Maybe it would have led you away from Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala and instead, it has brought you closer and this is increasing your ranks in jannah every single day you are alive. How beautiful is that you are being rewarded with what Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala has promised in his glorious Quran? The fruits of jannah, the rivers of jannah and the house in jannah, all because you stayed patient and you thanked Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala for it. There is no better reward in this life ever and the reward in the hereafter is much better so aim for that.

Insha’Allah, this has helped you overcome or even helped you feel a bit better about what you have went through in your life. Take advantage of every breathe, take advantage of every single day you are alive. You aren’t going to be able to press rewind on it, so live it like it is your last. Don’t let life bring you down and don’t allow your failures to prevent you from being successful and don’t allow the hardships of this life, take you away from the blessings you have been given.

If you have any questions or need advice, please feel free to email me at:

mshabazz33@gmail.com

Also, I have a written a self-help book titled “The Strongest Version Of Yourself” which covers issues just like this and many more. The PDF version is currently pay whatever you want or download it for free.

https://payhip.com/b/3FdM (Pay What You Want – PDF Version)

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00QFUJQHW ($4.99 – Kindle Version)

Read reviews here: http://mshabazz33.wordpress.com/the-strongest-version-of-yourself-book-reviews/

JazakAllah khair for reading :)

How To Fight Your Battles: Press Play

Originally posted on Think & Be Positive:

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We constantly battle ourselves everyday of our simple or busy lives. Our battles lie within several tunnels within our mind, within our heart and our subconscious. At times it eats us away with every little bite taken, sucking out every bit of life out of you. The ones we deal with, we seem to think, it is irregular or because I am not normal because I think this way or feel this way. We constantly think of ourselves to be not of the norm. The problems we are facing in our lives seems to be only our problems and nobody can understand them. At times we say to ourselves, “nobody knows how I feel!” We let out a big sigh and we just want to escape this world through a matrix or live in a dream.

Our battles stem beyond a predisposition which in fact, we’ve injected into our own…

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Go Easy On Yourself

Originally posted on Think & Be Positive:

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At times in our lives we have everything going for us. We have just graduated from school, we have a job, we are about to get married, we have a car and everything just seems so perfect! We have imagined days like this for months or even years, where everything just feels so right. All the years of being patient, all that hard work has finally come to close and a new chapter in our lives has begun. In these moments we are so happy, that we can’t even imagine things going wrong because everything is in the right place and we accept them with open arms. We begin to celebrate and even imagine all the things we will do in years to come with the new found blessings in our lives.

We also seem to forget that Allah SWT says in Surah Al-Baqara V:155: “Be sure we shall…

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Don’t Be Forced To Marry Someone You Don’t Want To

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Whenever you decide to get married, please don’t force yourself to like someone because your parents have presented them to you. Often at times, parents will present their children with someone they find interest in and then force their children to like them and marry them because they think they are a perfect fit for them. This is incorrect and you’ll more than likely be in a miserable marriage because you never wanted them in the first place. It’s like sitting at a table with your least favourite foods and they are telling you to eat it, while on the other side of the table, all your favourite foods are there.

Be smart when you are making this decision. It is going to be your life, your hours, your time, your heart, your effort into this marriage not your parents. Of course they’ll help you with the nikah and walima but after that, it is just you and your spouse. Parents who are culturally grounded will beg you stay in the marriage because it’ll tarnish their reputation, while you are emotionally destroyed everyday. They’ll force you, they’ll blackmail you, they’ll constantly beg you to stay. No, you don’t have to stay if you don’t want to, so before it ever gets to that point, make the right decision on who you want to marry. Don’t marry because your parents say they are good for you but know within your heart, from making a decision then praying ishtikhara if they are good for you. Ishtikhara isn’t Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala making a decision for you, it is Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala guiding you to a better decision. It’s not about dreams either. It’s not about seeing colours and all that. Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala is going to facilitate a matter which is going to be best for you.

Make a stand, be courageous, stand up for what you want and what you don’t think is right for you. If you are quiet while your parents are setting someone up for you, you are to blame because you allowed it. You are allowed to make decisions, so make sure, this one, marriage is a right decision and not a forceful one.

Helping you choose the right spouse is covered in my book “The Strongest Version Of Yourself”

You can purchase the book here:

https://payhip.com/b/3FdM (Currently Pay What You Want – PDF VERSION)

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00QFUJQHW ($4.99 – KINDLE VERSION)

12 Reviews Explaining How “The Strongest Version Of Yourself” Has Helped People Who Read It

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You can purchase the book here:

https://payhip.com/b/3FdM (Currently Pay What You Want – PDF VERSION)

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00QFUJQHW ($4.99 – KINDLE VERSION)

Book Reviews

Review #1

After reading ‘The strongest version of yourself’ I realized that I could be doing much more to reach my full potential. I think it’s a really good book for anyone who is looking for motivation of any kind, particularly those of us who are limiting ourselves. It definitely made me think further about the things I could do to help achieve my goals, and definitely made me appreciate the life that Allah has bestowed upon me. I also appreciate the fact that the author took verses out of the Quran and elaborated on them to suit the chapter and assist in getting the point across.

Derya Keles – Melbourne, Australia

Review #2

I have just finished reading your book. I love this book. I think this is a great inspirational book for anyone needing advice for situations that they have gone through or are currently going through. I don’t have any favorite chapters, as I thought they were all great chapters with great genuine advice. The two chapters that helped me are “The Past” and “A Hard Heart”. I learned to let go of my past and stop reliving the pain and hurt over and over again in my mind. To focus on now and look forward to the future Insha Allah. To not let my past prevent me from having a future. More importantly, I learned to not let my heart become hardened because of the actions of one individual, making me become someone whom I’m not but to continue to possess the attributes that Allah (SWT) has blessed me with. You are a blessing and inspiration to me. You are well on your way to becoming a great writer. May Allah bless you for your efforts and continue to bless you with more success.

Malikah Scott – Evansville, Indiana

Review #3

Woooow!!! just finished reading ur book a while ago. I knew it was going to be good but it turned out to be waaay good. Excellent book, honestly. Especially, as an American Muslim, thinking like us, having knowledge like this MashaAllah. May Allah bless u always. I liked all chapters really, especially using Hadith & using Ayat from Qur’an. Every chapter was different & useful, enjoyed it. It motivated me & how to be optimistic, and wanting to change things in life. And liked ur ending or conclusion.

Lamyaa Kandil – Dubai, United Arab Emirates

Review #4

Since my deen and mental-state have benefitted from your writings, I was very eager to read “the strongest version of yourself” And I must confess that my expectations have been fullfilled…
It’s pretty amazing that Allah (SWT) can change so much in your life through someone you haven’t even seen in real life. I feel like this book has been written for me because the topics touched many of my weaknesses that I have always wanted to change.
Without spoiling anything, all I wanna say is: If you are in a bad state of mind and feel a lack of motivation/inspiration, instead of spending loads of money at the place of a psychologist, first get yourself a hold of “the strongest version of yourself” and see how the buds blossom away. .
I mean after all this book isn’t just some “blah blab blah” by someone who is a stranger to you, but it is written by one of your brothers in Islam who made use of the best of suggestion about how to deal with life that is the Quran…

Fatma Kaganoglu – Wuppertal, Germany

Review #5

When I read ‘The Strongest Version Of Yourself’ I knew it was going to be good, and it was. The one thing I absolutely loved is how the author always finds a way to bring it back to Allah (swt) and how he incorporated hadiths to get his point across. All the chapters were well written but I have to say my favorite chapters were Dealing with Negative People, The Past, A Hard Heart and Love. I felt like I could relate to all those and isn’t that what we want when we read something? To learn lessons and gain knowledge. To see things in a new perspective. One of the many things I learned is not to let anyone control the way I feel. That we need to be in control of ourselves and especially of our hearts. So if you read this I guarantee you will learn something you didn’t know before and become inspired like I have been Alhamdulillah.

Nada H. – California

Review #6

Asalamu alaykum warahmatullah wabaraktu

I hope you are in the best of health, insha Allah.

I have just completed reading your book The Strongest Version of Yourself and I am happy to present the following review on your work:

To begin with, the style of writing is clear and easy to understand and relate to, so the audience is fully capable of understanding the core message you are promoting.

The content itself includes a lot of motivational concepts to better and improve oneself, along with a gentle push of encouragement from an Islamic perspective.

I felt many emotions while reading the book and connected to many chapters.
If you are someone who is not sure about who they are anymore, what they want in life, or how to stop letting life consume you, then this read is for you. Especially, if you are holding onto islam by a thread. It does not delve into the hardcore fiqh and fatwa’s, rather it portrays the famous and inspiring hadiths that many of us often forget as we are so engrossed in our busy lives and don’t give our Islam much thought, until Ramadan, for example.

I also think that this book has even more potential because you (author) have a passionate mindset about trying to not only better yourself, but also to promote and encourage individual’s to pursue a better lifestyle, according to Qur’an and sunnah, which in turn could improve communities, societies and entire nations.

I also wanted to ask you on your thoughts about the following quote in your book:
Page 66 “You are everything, Allah swt has invested in you”
I like the point you are making here which is that Allah swt WANTS to see each individual succeed in life, however I was contemplating on the idea suggesting that Allah invests in us. Investment would suggest that Allah has something to gain from us, when in reality, He does not need us nor does he gain anything from our existence. The truth of the matter is that He is already perfection and our existence does not and never can add or subtract from His perfection. Rather we could say that Allah wants to see us succeed, it is up to us whether we want to invest our time in remembering Him and securing our future, AKA investing in the akhira.??

——
Note:page 81 you have written “being strong physically Is easy, but being strong mentally is not.”
Question: what are your thoughts on: “being strong physically is hard, but being strong mentally is harder”. I only say this because it still takes a lot of time, dedication and work to be physically fit, and if it was that easy, we’d all have that perfect physique! (Just my personal opinion though!)

To conclude, I would like to say congratulations on your first book! It truly is an inspiring read and I will do my best to help promote it via as many social media platforms I can! I hope you don’t take my criticism as insult or something to put you down, rather as something constructive and a way to improve your work of inspiration! Jazakallah khair !

Lady Watermelon Jam

Review #7

I finished reading The Strongest Version of Yourself and I have to say it’s like a breath of fresh air! Definitely changed my mindset for the better and I couldn’t have come across it at a better time. From start to finish, you can feel the sincerity. Clearly, these words have been written with a clean and caring heart.

These days it is easy to get caught up in things which leave you with a negative mindset. The advice in this book direct you to see things differently and motivates you into taking action so that you can achieve becoming a better person. I especially love how you learn how to move on from the negative past. I also really appreciate the important reminder to humble yourself, be thankful and put your trust in Allah SWT.

I would recommend this to anyone who cares to better their lives and boost their Iman.

Zainab Elsayed – Toronto, Ontario

Review #8

This book provides help for those in need of motivation and encouragement to move forward towards their full potential.

Some of the chapters may relate to you so well that you might feel like it’s written especially for you. That was how I felt when I read it. Take the good advice provided, and with Allah’s guidance, In Sha Allah we will be able to benefit.
Whatever we are going through, always remember that this life and all it’s trials are just part of Dunya. There will be happiness and pain, sometimes anger and feelings of being cheated – these are all life’s games for us. Take it easy and breathe, Pray and be strong. In Sha Allah this book will assist you to do just that..
Fazlynn Nadira – Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia
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Review #9

I came across your book on Instagram and I would be happy to give you some feedback.I first read your book a month back and since I received your email I felt it was fair to go through it again to give better feedback.I like the approach you take to writing. Your book was like listening to a very dear friend, someone who really cares about you who wants the best for you, giving you the best advice to keep you going. It really made me think hard about my life, the past and the future and I connected with it straight away. It was very personal- which means a number of things. Your advice and words were very real. I think every single person could relate to the content in your book, in one way or another. Your words were very encouraging and the reminders from the Qur’an and sunnah were added gems which reinforced your words in a nice manner. It was very accessible; no fancy words- which makes it wonderful for many to read and understand it without a problem. However, I don’t mean to be a pain but there were  one or two grammatical errors and other minor details which I have listed and could email you them if that would be helpful.Dealing with negative people was a really thought provoking chapter for me due to personal experiences and so were the chapters on the past. Actually now that I think about it, the whole book seemed to make complete sense to me and I could relate to pretty much everything- as if it was written for me. Not many books can make you feel like that.I have always enjoyed writing myself.  I am a reflective person and I write mostly in my journal, my thoughts etc, but honestly, reading your work makes me want to write to help others also.I noticed on your blog that you are thinking of taking a break from writing… personally I think that you should continue writing, because you do it well and have really good things to say. You could reach a million people with your words and you may not get the credit you deserve, but Allah appreciates every single one of your efforts in reminding and helping people feel positive and return to Allah, the only One who can change people’s lives around. I reckon you help more people than you realise and if your intentions are to genuinely help others then you shouldn’t feel discouraged by a lack of response because Allah knows how hard you’re trying and it doesn’t go unnoticed. And who knows where your work could go, where and who it could reach…It’s difficult to take your own advice. I’m not too great at that either.  But in sha’Allah there are great things ahead.I appreciate the time you took to write your book and I found reading it very helpful and it also reminded me to be more productive and stop wanting things to change without taking bigger steps to make change happen. So JazakhAllah khair, May Allah shower you with blessings in this world and the Hereafter for all your hard work and dedication. May He ease your burdens and make us all the strongest version of ourselves.

P.S I would love to read whatever else you have written or are in the process of writing.

R.W.  – United Kingdom
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Review #10
Firstly, I would like to tell you thank you for coming back to fb. You are such an inspiration to so many of us. I’m sure you go through a lot as so many of us do, but please don’t give up on your dreams we have so much to gain and learn from your insightfulness. I don’t remember how or why I stumbled across your blog but I’ve been a fan since then. You’re words have given me hope and inspiration in my daily life and it’s very refreshing to have something to read that gives you a different perspective of our time here in this world.
I enjoyed your book a lot it made me look at myself and my faults at a much deeper level. It helped me realize that a lot of the pain and hardships I been through have been because of myself and my negative thoughts. It took me a long time to ponder over and come to this conclusion. You’ve helped me realize that I should live my life more for Allah swt and whatever he has written for me I will get in due time. You’ve helped me to be free of the bondage of this world and bring me peace and happiness. You’ve helped me realize this world is nothing but a test and that this world is temporary and the true blessings and rewards are with our creator. I have a lot more work to do to improve myself but inshallah I’ll get there.
Thank you brother for the advice you have given me it has helped me in more ways then you know and I’m sure it’s the same for many others who reads your work. Please continue to remind us it benefits the believes who strive hard in the way of Allah swt. Please continue to write you have no idea how beneficial your words are to us! FYI
I also enjoyed your videos. Please be patient brother Allah swt will reward you in more ways than you possibly know for helping all of us.

Jazakallah khair brother

May Allah guide, reward,and bring you peace!
Salaam
Kendra Hughes – Louisville, Kentucky, USA
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Review #11
I  downloaded your book and I found it is so motivating and able to ‘switch’ my negative view to the positive.
The words written really understandable and could reach till the bottom of my heart. Why did I say so? Because it seems like knowing every single things play around in my mind and the words are like a magical portion which could ‘heal’ the injury inside. The thing that I love most is when u came with surah and hadith which could open people’s eyes to see the significance and reason behind the trial or test given to us. We recite quran everyday but sometimes we don’t know the ‘ibrah or lesson behind verses. The same goes to me. The book is likely to be regarded as a motivational book but for me it’s more than that coz it incites me to learn more bout quranic verses and hadith and encourage me to strengthen my belief and bond with Allah.
Thanx for the great advices,encouragement and support ‘for all this while’.
May Allah bless u in Duniya’ and akhirah.. Biidznillah..
Adie Adiatul – Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia
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Review #12

Asalamalaykum

I read your book and I was touched by how much effort you put into it. As I was reading, it was as if I was hearing your voice driving me on and encouraging me to better myself. I felt as if I had found my own personal motivator whom I could refer to any time if needed. It is also really easy for anyone to read and understand, plain and simple ;no long and difficult words. Therefore it’s great for teenagers and school kids who would benefit hugely from your book.
My favourite chapters are ‘Love ‘ and ‘If ‘.  You really inspired me and helped me immensely. I also gave it to my teenage daughter to read. She was really impressed as well.
Thank you for sharing this wonderful piece of work with the world and for always trying your best to help others. It does not go unnoticed. I look forward to your future books and may  Almighty Allah reward you for your efforts,  Inshallah Ameen.

S.P. – South Africa

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You can purchase the book here:

https://payhip.com/b/3FdM (Currently Pay What You Want – PDF VERSION)

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00QFUJQHW ($4.99 – KINDLE VERSION)

Food For Thought IV

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Learn to let go of the world around you and you’ll see yourself in a totally different light. Find yourself invisible standing in front of world and you’ll conquer fears that have held you back. Let go of what the world thinks of you and you’ll learn to be yourself. Let pain be strength and let your sujood (prostration) be peace. Mend your heart by loving yourself and letting go of everything that was never meant to be. Look towards the future by learning from your past, for everything in it was a lesson, a creation of who you are today. Nothing was meant to harm you, except to prepare you and protect you from things that were no good for you. At times let your tears flow to escape this difficult life at times but turn to Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala for it is through Him where the hearts find rest. Take care of your body as it’ll age with you. For what you put in it, is an investment and the return will insha’Allah, will help you live a better life. Stay away from negative people for they will destroy you, just as they are destroying themselves. Stay away from those who constantly complain, for they have not learned nor understood the blessings of life. Find positive people for they will encourage you, brighten your day and will help you see your blessings in life. This life is temporary, so find a good spouse who will help you strengthen your eman (faith) and will encourage you to get closer to your Lord. Look to remember your happy times when in misery and when in happy times, remember your where you once were, Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala has blessed you with good.

Be a voice when there is injustice and learn to speak your mind. A trapped voice is a prisoner in your body that you’ve held captive. Go towards what makes you happy and let go of other people’s dreams. Let them achieve theirs and you achieve your own. Money doesn’t mean success and money is not happiness, do what you love and the money will come. You will become successful for not following the crowd and following your heart. There is not a single soul like you in the world but there is a soul created for you, so be patient when seeking, knowing they are destined to be in your life. Learn to make better choices and learn not to regret on the choices you’ve made, if you didn’t make bad choices, you would not know how to make better choices. This life is simple but you make it difficult by wasting your energy on things that have not existed yet, you need to allow things to happen by taking steps in those directions. Let go of the words I can’t and I’ll fail because failures are apart of life’s growth process and I can’t is only an obstacle of the mind and your failures will lead to you to success.

This life is temporary so don’t waste it away. Live good, be kind, advise others as if you are in their position, help others and seek rewards only from Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala.  Be patient with what you are striving for, It’ll come when it is time. Just keep working and eventually it’ll come. Whatever is meant to come your way is already written and what is not is already written. Live everyday as it is your last, stop worrying what others think of you and be yourself, it is the key to success.

Read More Food For Thoughts Here:

Part 1

http://mshabazz33.wordpress.com/2014/01/06/food-for-thought/

Food For Thought Part II

http://mshabazz33.wordpress.com/2014/08/07/food-for-thought-ii/

Food For Thought Part III

http://mshabazz33.wordpress.com/2014/09/17/food-for-thought-iii/

Purchase my e-book “The Strongest Version Of Yourself”

https://payhip.com/b/3FdM ($4.99 – PDF Version)

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00QFUJQHW ($4.99 – Kindle Version)

Read reviews here: http://mshabazz33.wordpress.com/the-strongest-version-of-yourself-book-reviews/

Be Careful With The People You Follow Online

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It is always important to know a few things about the people you follow online. Being an internet personality is easy to do today but not many are teaching something and when they are, it is incorrect. Any person can quote verses form the Qur’an and any person can quote Hadiths. Any person can speak or write well but is it with the correct knowledge? I see many people on my personal facebook page who have liked pages of groups and people but are teaching people to blindly follow their madhabs (schools of thoughts). They are teaching people that it is okay to make duaa (supplication) to people in the grave as they are intercessors for you and your duaa to Allah. They are teaching people that is okay to celebrate the Prophets birthday, when in fact, there is no clear evidence on the date he was born, when many scholars differed about it. Some say the 8th, some say the 10th, some say the 12th of Rabee Al Alwal and some even say, he was born in the month of Ramadan or Safar but it is known from hadiths that the prophet was in fact born on a Monday.

The Prophet Muhammad (Peace & Blessings Be Upon Him) was asked about fasting on Mondays and he said: “That is a day on which I was born and on it my mission began – or Revelation came to me.” [Muslim]

As muslims, it is important to know what types of personalities we are following online and what type of knowledge they spreading amongst the ummah. Just because they can speak well, doesn’t mean they wont misguide you. Be very careful who you take your knowledge from. Also be careful on whose status you raise up and whose words you glorify as well. Take this deen (religion) seriously and learn it from the authentic sources. Be balanced and know what is correct and what is incorrect, just so you aren’t blindly following that sheikh or imam. Be aware of the conferences you attend and who the speakers are. Some retreats are based on innovation, as I have seen with my own eyes, thanks to social media and camera phones.

In the end, we are responsible for only us and nobody else. Leave what is doubtful and follow what is correct, the straight path because you ask to be guided to the straight path everyday, 5 times a day when you recite Surah Al Fatiha in your salah and then say Ameen.

You Can Walk Away

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Learn to let go of negative people in your life. If the individual isn’t bringing you up but constantly putting you down, then they shouldn’t be apart of your life. Why be around people or be with someone who doesn’t help you grow but keep you depressed? Why be with someone who constantly takes advantage of you? Do you enjoy being a doormat? It doesn’t take much courage to walk away, it just takes you knowing you deserve better than what you are receiving now.

You may think, there isn’t someone better but the truth is, there is ALWAYS better. Stop thinking you don’t deserve it when you know, you do. Walk away, let go of misery and depression that comes packaged in a person. You weren’t created to be abused and misused but you were created to be loved for the sake ofAllah subhanahu wa ta’ala and grow with those individuals to be successful, to grow in eman (faith) and to insha’Allah, enter jannah.

I’ve learned to let go of those who put me down because they were doing me no good. Everyday, surrounded with people who would suck the energy out of me. Would call me worthless or would call me a bum. I knew, I was neither of those and I knew, they weren’t deserving of me. I’ve learned to go towards what I deserve in life. Everything is the decree of Allah but you have a choice whether you want to endure pain and hardship from people. People you choose to keep in your life. This is something you CAN make better, so don’t settle for the abuse nor settle for hearing cultural backlash. You are allowed to walk away despite what your culture thinks or what your parents think. They aren’t enduring abuse, you are.

Learn to walk away. There is never too late, there is just now. You are the now.

Purchase my book “The Strongest Version Of Yourself” and insha’Allah, it’ll help you through many things in your life.
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Chapter 6 – A Hard Heart

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Copyright © 2014 by Malik Shabazz

All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof

may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever

without the express written permission of the author

except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

 

This is one of my favourite chapters of my book and many others who have read it.

Chapter 6 – A Hard Heart

At some point in our lives, we have been hurt by someone who we loved so dearly or cared for deeply. We spent hours with them, treated them as if they were kings or queens, giving them everything on a plater, making them happy and smile. We would go out of our way and give them what they need, even if we were in the middle of something. There would be nothing in this world we wouldn’t do for that certain individual or individuals because they meant the world to us.


Along the way, something went wrong. We either fell apart or had differences that led us drifting apart and sometimes that is good. Other times, we would be stabbed in the back, taken advantage of and disposed as if we were never good enough for that individual no matter what we have done for them. Eventually, we look to blame ourselves for everything that has transpired. Truthfully, we are to blame because we allowed others to do as they please, whenever they pleased, just so they could get what they want, while we looked to be loved and accepted. It only turns disastrous and depressing, pushing us into a dark place blaming every single human being on the planet, as if they are all the same and each of them comes to do the same thing.


In that dark place, in that time of depression, we think over everything we have done for those individuals. We think how come they never treated us right? How come, they never loved us and admired us for what we did for them? It turns into memories being played every night and going to sleep with heavy thoughts and a heavy heart, crying our eyes out because we only wanted to be accepted, loved and recognized. When it didn’t come, we closed our heart to the entire world, while we used to wear it on our sleeve.
There was a point in our lives where we would smile through the pain no matter how bad it hurt but this time, it was different. The smile would disappear and sitting alone thinking of what transpired over the years made us feel bitter. Making us regret the years and time invested into those individuals who we did everything for. It tares us apart anytime we think of it and it gets us angry when we think of them or see them. Eventually this bitterness, this cold and dark place we reflected in, turns our hearts hard. We used to be sweet, kind, open, expressive, helpful but now we are reserved for only ourselves and everyone else is an enemy to us.


Having a hard heart will never do anything for us, except let it run through veins and into our daily actions, keeping us bitter and cold towards everyone who tries to get near us. We think everyone is the enemy and everyone is capable of harming us the same way, when this is not true at all. Just because others have taken advantage of your kindness, of your sweetness, of your expressiveness, does not mean others will have the intention to do the same.
There are so many people in the world who would LOVE to be catered by you, as you have catered to others, only for you to be accepted and loved, as you have always wanted to be by that one individual or those individuals in the past. This particular individual, will be open to you and will appreciate everything you are doing for them.


If you keep your heart hard, you lose out on your naturalness, your uniqueness, which has been given to you by Allah SWT. A hard heart only affects one person and that is you because instead of learning a lesson from those who have taken advantage of you, you instead closed yourself off, put a seal on your heart and threw the keys away. What good has that done you? You may think, it is a brilliant idea because no one else will be able to harm you but what about those who don’t actually want to harm you? How many people are you turning away due to your hard heart? How many people have walked into your life thus far that wanted to see the person you once were, only in return to get the person you are not because of your hard heart? Look at how much pain you’ve caused yourself.


It is time to let go and make better choices with your life and let your heart ease itself back into who you once were but this time, into a stronger version of yourself. Let yourself be free of heartache and let your heart open itself and uncage itself from the harsh memories you reflect on. Break the hardness of your heart with the remembrance of Allah and no one else.


Allah SWT says in the Qur’an:
“Verily, only in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find rest.” [13:28]


There is no place in the world like in sujood (prostration) where you’ll find ease and relaxation. Where your heart will feel content about the act of worship you’ve done. Whatever hardness has covered your heart, speak to Allah SWT about it in sujood and let your tears flow and ask Him to guide you to an understanding about the lessons you were supposed to learn from what happened.


After you’ve done that, let your life take a better journey from the bitterness it went through and allow yourself to recover and look at life optimistically. Look at everyone as if you’ve never met them and each individual has something to teach you and not something to take away from you. A hard heart is not something you want to live with but a pure heart, a warm heart, the one you once had and the one you will have again, is the one you always want to keep.


We all make choices in our life, so make a choice to keep your heart clean and never with any hardness attached to it. If others don’t receive you for your acts of kindness and appreciation, look at is as Allah SWT knowing you’ve done all that and reward lies with him and nobody else. There are no rewards in the world like the ones given to you by the creator of the heavens and the earth. Never do anything to seek appreciation or praise or even acknowledgment but look to do things for the sake of Allah SWT as the rewards and blessings are with Him.


Eventually, in due time, there will be an individual who walks into your life who is able to appreciate your sweetness, your kindness, your loving and unique nature and will cherish it for the rest of their lives. Until then, let your heart be free of the hardness that has covered it and let you be you again, being the strongest version of yourself from the lessons you’ve learned. Don’t let life and its difficulties along with the people in it, to make your heart hard but let it be as it is meant to be and be who you always were. Keep it soft and never let the worlds trials and hardships change that into a hard one nor let people who never understood your uniqueness and your purpose take advantage of it.

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